Day 2: V-Day "I'M BEING HEALTHY DAMMIT!"

This is obligatory because I've promised to blog every day of lent. But this is also obligatory because Valentine's Day is a mixed-blessing. I personally love Valentine's Day. It's got candy, chocolate, dates (with lovers, friends, and family), and you get to make a little note to tell someone you love them. And shut up to all the, "but you should express your love all year" people. Just. Shut up. I do fucking express my love all year. I say it every damn day and mean it when I say it. I give hugs, send nice messages, call to check in on people, and buy random-ass things I know they'll enjoy because I love the people in my life. And they do the same for me. Now. This is a WHOLE DAY set aside to celebrate love. We have days to celebrate boxing, the births of famous people, the deaths of famous people, all of the United States presidents at once... why do we hate on a day set aside for love?
Now. I recognize that media has turned made it about romance. I get that. That's cool. But whether or not you buy (eh-hem) into that is up to you. Because I'm a single lady, I choose not to. With a boyfriend, sure, I'd probably bring some romance into it; but I will never neglect the other people I love. Valentine's Day is both over and underrated. It's taken over jewelry industries and chocolate companies, and fancy restaurants. But it has not been recognized for it's full potential.

Okay. Moving on.

Woohoo! Holding strong. This is also V-Day to fight abuse against women and girls for those of you interested. I was blessed with a million gifts of candy that I had to turn away (or put away) because of Lent. But somehow it didn't feel like that much of a chore. I'M BEING HEALTHY DAMMIT! So I don't have a whole lot to say on that one.
Note that all day between these pictures I drank a lot of water and ate a lot of nuts and seeds. I just took a container to all my classes. Here's da foods:

Breakfast: Quaker oatmeal made from water with cherry juice to drink

Lunch: Spinach salad with broccoli, carrots, cucumber, and olive oil &vinegar. Granola cereal with soy milk (already gobbled up). Zucchini and peppers. An apple. And soy milk to drink.

Dinner Appetizer: Salad with carrots, broccoli, edamame, sunflower seeds, and olive oil & vinegar. (Noticing a trend?) That's unsweetened ice tea to drink.

Dinner: The server swore all of this was cooked in oil. Grilled green beans, sweet potato fries, and rice pilaf.

Nighttime Snack: THESE THINGS ARE SO GOOD.

I worked out by myself today (something I rarely do) and just jogged a mile running the last lap. That's really about it. Other than that because of leaving my shit everywhere I had to power walk all over campus which did hell on my calves. "Sometimes love don't feel like it should..."

This is what I wrote in my journal this morning:
Today for myself I will work out. I know it's kind of required, but I'm actually excited about it today.
Today I will make valentines for everyone on Union Board.
Today I am most excited to eat with Jim and Grandma.
Today I am most anxious about changing my routine (adding workout and eating in towers).
Today I am thankful for soy milk.

So, I'm not going to post my meals on here every night because I do it on Facebook all day long. It's getting a bit redundant. Plus the pictures litter up the post and I don't get to say much else. Here's my page to go like it if you want to follow my sweet, sweet vegan ass. 

You should also probably follow me on Twitter because I'm fun.

For those of you who are new, here's the post that explains what the hell I'm doing.

This Election and My Uterus

I'm a pretty loud-mouthed liberal, so I doubt many of you wonder my reasons for voting for Obama. But as a woman, I wanted you to know where I'm sitting. Where are you?

Abortion and Birth Control
This didn't used to be so close to my heart, but this has hit home. First of all: I'm on birth control because I have cramps from hell. My insurance provides that for me because I need it in order to attend class regularly and perform to the best of my ability at work. I'm also a (somewhat) sexually active, adult woman. Even if I had perfectly normal periods and didn't require medication to regulate them, I would be on birth control, because that's the responsible thing for me to do. My insurance company should still support me in making that responsible decision. When I have sex, I am not only on birth control now, but I use condoms--responsibility, folks. If I were to get pregnant under those circumstances, I sure as hell would get an abortion. I am in no way ready to have a child and I in no way want one.

I'm offended and creeped out that these GOP politicians are so concerned with my sex life. I will do whatever the fuck I want with this body, I will be as safe as I can when I do it, and if all that falls through, I will not further curse this nation with the birth of another unwanted child. Tell me how the Republican Party can oppose birth control, abortion, and funding for social programs? You don't want to help prevent pregnancy? Cool. You don't want to help end what you did not want to help prevent? Ummm... You don't want to support the child that would not prevent coming into this world? Fuck you. That is greed.

Many want to argue that this is not a War on Women. I call bull shit. If a man gets a woman pregnant by rape, incest, or consensual sex, he can walk away. He holds no legal responsibility while the woman clearly does. He commits a legal abortion by disappearing, leaving the mother to deal with that kid. A woman doesn't get that option. If she becomes pregnant and is forced to carry the child to term, then she is responsible. The world may never know who the father is--but she is marked. That child is hers. She has to drop everything to raise it. Or adoption, whatever. But let's be real. We have enough kids in the system. Maybe we should put a little more emphasis on those children who are already alive with friends, talents, interests, and loves.
And I love when some say they're only okay with abortion in cases of rape and incest... yadda yadda. Because the woman wants to go to court after she was raped to prove it was rape... meanwhile the child comes closer and closer to the point in its term where abortion is no longer an option. Incest? Maybe she doesn't WANT the person to know she's pregnant. And in the end, how do we prove any of this? We can't, really. Not even science is positive on that. So all y'all are full of shit. You're just trying to make yourselves feel better about telling rape victims they have to raise that baby. This is just something that cannot be government regulated.

Here are some further concerns I don't have the energy to write about in detail:
Capital Punishment
The War on Terror
Fear of Theocracy
Public Programming (a weak attempt at appearing fiscally conservative)
Foreign Relations
Medicare and Social Security
Gay Marriage
Equal Pay (without the help of binders)
My future in a mental health field

Adventure Time--and other gag-worthy children's shows

I wish it would stop moving. And promoting unhealthy eating habits.

Television has potential to be educational. Sure. Okay. That's not what I'm talking about. Dora and Barney? I got no beef. Adventure Time. Are you effing kidding me? I only watched one episode, and this is what I found:

1. Sexual innuendos
2. Poor grammar
3. Borderline cursing
4. Poor boundaries; both verbally and physically
5. Pointless, lesson-less, mind-numbing entertainment

 This is inappropriate for children. This is an example of why we should be teaching our children healthy messages about their bodies and sexuality--because television shows, directed towards our youth, are doing it for us. The kids watching this show aren't old enough to be exposed to sex in this way, but if parents allow their kids to watch it, they should probably be watching too in order to explain and ask their child to question those things that bother them. Seriously.

Also. The grammar. In shows directed towards adults, poor grammar is used as a comedic tool that references a lack of educated, a low socioeconomic status, child-like speech, or even people of specific regions (particularly the south). I don't always agree with that in shows for adults, because I think it furthers our skewed ideas of culture, but I'll admit I've laughed. We watched this show. They didn't laugh. The kids just assumed it to be correct. When children are that young, they're still learning what's okay in our society. They're still idolizing their parents, teachers, older peers and siblings... they haven't found themselves quite yet (as if we ever do, ha!). But they're taking in the images on the tv screen. Television is our culture's most popular babysitter. They didn't laugh because they still think they're being taught. They think it's correct.

I'm sure you do.

 Borderline cursing. I tend to think cursing is overrated. Words are words, nothing more or less. Some words are weighted with a certain kind of power that they're child-like alternatives lack. Darn/damn, frick/fuck, shoot/shit, etc. But there are words that are arguable. Pissed, sucks, God, etc. This show makes use of those arguable curse words as well as the "almost" words. Now, these are things we don't let kids say. Personally, I think it shouldn't matter as much as it does. Kids have feelings equally as important as adults', yet they're not permitted to use the same powerful speech we use. But society says otherwise. We punish kids who cross that line, or eve toe it. We can't punish kids for words like sucks, pissed, God, frick, danged, or whatever; if we allow them to receive their education from a talking box. They'll say what they hear. We need to either normalize ourselves to children cursing, or we need to stop the source from which they hear it.

Boundaries! I watched one character hold another's ass while they made it dance for them... with no pants on. Granted. It's a cartoon, and it's a dog. But they gave the dog an ass that resembled a human's... and the character was holding it. They bite each other. They lick each other. They had a baby (which they'd stolen), and shook it around because it wouldn't "jiggle" for them. They wanted to "get down," and the baby was "ruining the mood." Nuff said.

All in all, it's a lame show. It's not actually that well-done. The script isn't interesting or informative. There's not really music between clips. The plot is dumb and unrealistic. Nothing important comes from it. That was a wasted hour in those kids' lives. It's an hour they could have practiced reading, created art, listened and danced to music, played a game in the yard, or even talking to one another--quite a lost art. I was offended, really. I am so over television. My children will watch PBS and documentaries. Nothing. Fucking. Else. Oh, my God. No hope for humanity. :(

"Lump off"

I'm a cock...

Why couldn't they have just said rooster?

but not in the penis way. But the title got your attention, right? It is my belief that only my really weird titles ever get views, so I'm alternating normal and weird titles as an experiment to test this theory. But I promise that the title has a lot to do with the actual story. It kind of is the story. I've been cycling through some of the family classics lately--the stories brought up to embarrass children through adulthood. These are the stories that are funny to everyone but the person they're about until that person just decides to get over their cockiness (heh heh) and laugh along. Because I was really weird and didn't have a lot of friends my age, I'm nearly always the subject of these stories. I'm also the youngest child, which means there were more people to remember my embarrassing moments, and mine are the most recent.

Today I went to Panda Garden with Kyle. Panda Garden is arguably the best Chinese food in Terre Haute, and I've been going since I was a baby. They even gave us a free meal once, because one time I packed a bag full of my old Burger King toys and handed them out to the waiters and waitresses. It was New Year's Eve, and their anniversary. Panda Garden and I are the same age. The owner was charmed (and who wouldn't be? I'm hella cute), and gave us our meal for free. That event, paired with the fact Panda Garden had the only vegetables I would eat, made it a frequent visit for the Markle-Thompson-Webster-Dunahee family.

Panda Garden had those placemats (I don't care what my internet spellcheck thinks. Placemats is totally one word), with the Chinese Zodiac on them and personality traits of each animal. I'm pretty sure most Chinese restaurants has those, actually, now that I think about it. Anyway, unfortunately, I'm a rooster. <--That's what I should have said over lunch with my family and my friend Brittany.

I was one of those kids who never really got sexual references until like... high school. Yeah. It wasn't until "that's what she said" became a regular part everyone's vocabulary that I understood any of it. Then I probably took it too far, because when you give a 14 year-old that phrase, when they've always been the last one to get innuendos, they're going to abuse it. And before I knew anything about "she," or anything, really, cock only meant rooster. At least to me.

And one day I said it a little too loudly, because I talk loudly all the time (now that I think of it. No one should have ever told me I was a cock based solely on how much, how quickly, and how loudly I speak). "I'm a cock." And Mom was like, "Maddie, don't say that so loud." And because I was sensitive about being a loudmouth, I said it louder to piss her off. And it went from there. And in the middle of my defiant rant that left everyone at the table and surrounding tables debilitating-ly uncomfortable, I said "Darren's a cock, Ian's a cock, I'm a cock..." and I wouldn't shut up.

I'm a cock
Ian's a cock
Darren's a cock
I'm a cock
I'm a cock
I'm a cock...

And Brittany was in that I'm not sure if I'm allowed to laugh so I'm just going to look really awkward and try not to really, really hard kind of place, and Mom desperately tried to make me shut up, which made me even more of a brat about it.

It wasn't until we got out to the car that Mom said, "Maddie. Cock is another word for penis."

And I was mortified.

And since my family has used that story any time Chinese food came into conversation, or anytime they possibly could in order to mortify me. It wasn't so much that I was embarrassed I'd said those things. It was more embarrassment that I was in like... 6th grade and still didn't know what cock meant. But now that I'm older, 6th grade sounds pretty damn young. AND I can totally blame my ignorance on Catholic school and the Disney Channel.

Not. My. Fault. It's also the combined effort of my parents that I'm a cock in the first place. In theory, this is basically everyone's fault but mine. I'm going to stick with that.

This Post is About Sex

Twisterrrrrrr

You know what has more views than any other post? The one about me not shaving. So. This post is about sex. It really is. But I thought that title might help me out. ;)

S.E.X. You mean… sex? Ahhhhh!

That was a conversation between my grandmother and me when I was about 9.

I think our culture’s fear of sex is both amusing and terrifying. I think sex is a natural part of life and suppression is both unhealthy and unwarranted. In the early days of religion, sex was strongly encouraged. “Be fruitful and multiply.” These kinds of messages were necessary evolutionarily to continue our race. HAVE SEX AND HAVE LOTS OF IT Genesis told us. So men have a whole bunch of wives because 9 months is just too long to wait to make another child. Monogamous relationships would have been counterproductive to the continuation of humankind. And because of our ability to communicate these ideas, specifically as instructions directly from a higher power that has control over our afterlife, humans thrived. WE HAVE SO MANY! Whoa. But let’s get real. If we don’t believe in polygamy anymore, then we shouldn’t view sex as sinful anymore, either.

We don’t need to have so many people, because we’re using and abusing the world’s resources. For that reason, we have contraceptive devises. ßGenius stuff really. And at puberty, when kids start to have urges to reproduce, they may or may not choose to wait for a number of reasons. I think these reasons can be narrowed down to a lack of education, religious beliefs, fear of judgment from peers or family, fear of disease, or fear of pregnancy.

Those are all well-founded reasons to wait. But regardless, those urges are there. And some people aren’t going to wait, especially those who have been raised with really unhealthy ideas of what sex means. I think it’s our public school system’s job to educate kids on what sex is, the role it plays in relationships as defined by our society, and how to prevent pregnancy and STDs and STIs. I think it’s our public school system’s job to counsel kids on when they’re ready for sex, ideas of sex based on experiences with sexual abuse, and which decision is best for them if they have contracted an STD or STI or have become pregnant.

I don’t think someone is ready for sex unless they are comfortable with their bodies, comfortable with their sexuality, are well-educated, and have found a partner with mutual expectations. Those are difficult standards to define, which is why I wish sex wasn’t such a taboo topic. Then those would have clearer definitions, and kids wouldn’t feel as scared to approach someone to really discuss where they stand. And personally I think in our society you aren’t ready to have a child until you’ve reached adulthood, which should be redefined as 21 (and sometimes not then really). And I only say this because of judgments our society makes concerning young parents and the structure of our educational system.

Educating kids on sex isn’t going to make them want to have sex. Likely, the same reasons kids don’t have sex will remain firm, and more kids who do have sex with use protection or know better what it means to be ready for sex. And I find that the same people that are against sex education are against abortion, health care, and supporting social welfare programs. A lack of sex education leads to diseases, unwanted pregnancies, and eventually uncared-for children. (Extreme generalization, I’m aware. But these are ideas put in kids’ heads that they’ll take into adulthood about readiness and protection.) So if you support this lack of education, then you should be supporting programs to deal with the backlash of these unwanted pregnancies, unwanted babies, and unwanted STwhatevers. You can’t just put kids into a pit of lions and ditch them without helping them when things go badly. That may have worked with Daniel, but he was the good guy in that story… and how many other people make it out of a pit of freaking hungry lions?

This all comes down to our ridiculous fear of sex. There are ways to protect your children from unhealthy ideas of sex and to encourage waiting until marriage (if that is something you care about), but pretending sex doesn’t exist isn’t all that effective. If you don’t educate your kids first, then the kids who have been exposed to sex (sexual abuse, sexual exploitation, exposure to sexual behavior and images at home) will do the talking for you. Do you see how this can be problematic? We’re so scared of sex, that the least healthy messages around sex are what circulate among our youth.

I can attest to this! I’m barely an adult. My mom did a great job of educating me, but I still heard what kids had to say. And the naïve kids soaked it all up because they didn’t want to look dumb. Sex seemed like a big kid thing, and the bad kids knew all about it (because they were forced to grow up too quickly). I remember thinking it was kind of creepy (I don’t use that word lightly here) the way kids saw sex when I was in middle school and high school. I hadn’t taken enough time to think about why. It all comes down to fear. And it’s starting to piss me off. Tell me what you think. Please?